Beneath

Sometimes life feels like breathing;

You inhale, you exhale,

You take in, you give out.

Equilibrium surrounds;

the assurance of removal and replacement,

That you contribute to, and are provided for.

 

But then there are other days,

when life feels like drowning.

When everything pushes in,

and nothing is allowed to escape.

Not even the scream.

Times when walls surround, voices dominate, confusion reigns.

The world capsizes and the climate goes grey.

 

When beneath, you do anything to simulate the surface,

anything to plateau.

Whatever brings release;

whatever stimulates the faux sensation of life prior to the submersion.

The addiction calls.

Like a siren it persuades,

promising life, but anchoring us down into to the fathoms below.

 

I must kick.

Fight against the oceans pull,

And resist the lies the siren promises.

There is no breath here,

regardless of the momentary sensation in my lungs.

Life only awaits above,

the surface tension can be broken.

This will not be my abode or grave.

I must kick.

 

And on those days when my legs are too tired,

when my strength is gone,

I surrender my hands skyward and await for heaven’s pull.

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